Am I dead and is this heaven?

 It was like waking from a dream. I was slowly becoming aware of light and the warm air surrounding me, my vision coming into focus. As the picture before me sharpened I realized I was sitting at the end of a valley that ran deep, long, and was surrounded by high snow-covered mountain peaks. The sun at the far end of the valley was shining a reddish-orange color as if it was just coming up in the early morning or just going down in the late evening. As the image became even clearer I could see a lake with the sun reflected diamonds sparkling on its surface. I was sitting on a small shelf-like rock outcropping that leaned out over this end of the valley allowing me an unrestricted view. As my awareness continued to grow I recognized the aroma of sage and licorice being carried on a warm breeze as it washed over me. On the left side of the valley, billowing up over the snow-capped peaks, huge cumulus clouds like the ones I used to see in Florida every afternoon in the summer. They were not menacing but boiling up powerfully like they were alive. Down below on the right side of the valley, following the contour of the lake, was what looked like a small dirt path. As I began to look around me more carefully I noticed creatures. Bugs, worms. spiders, all crawling about on the fringes of the rock shelf I was on. Each one seemed to glow as if they were giving off light on their own. Strange, I never considered that there would be bugs in heaven. Heaven!? Is that where I am?? 

  It wasn’t just that there were bugs, there were also birds and squirrels, ducks and geese along with dogs and cats. Each surrounded in this faint heavenly glow. They were all standing around looking at me. I guess this could be heaven. As I turned to look around a huge and I mean huge full moon rose up over the hill behind me. Again I’m not sure if it is rising or setting but I had the impression it was rising. It was the biggest full moon I could ever remember seeing, shining brilliantly. Its light was not only bright but seemed to be bringing out a vibration in me as well, I too was glowing. It was an exciting feeling, my whole body seemed to be radiating this energy. It was obvious that I was not just observing anymore. I felt a part of all that surrounded me. I could feel what everything was experiencing. The clouds, the water in the lake, all the creatures, even the sun, and moon. I wasn’t just seeing with my eyes, it was as if I was a part of everything that existed. Just as I was turning back away from the moon, out of the corner of my eye I thought I saw a figure silhouetted against the huge glowing sphere. When I turned back to look directly at it I couldn’t see it anymore but when I turned to the side, not looking directly, out of the corner of my eye I could see it, a silvery silhouette of a person. Then I heard the voice, it sounded like many voices at once all around me. It sounded like a chorus of voices both male and female. Familiar for some reason. One calm word: “Welcome!” 

 Startled I turned quickly back toward the moon this time I could see this human silhouette. It appeared to be wearing some kind of wispy flowing garment that blew in the light sage and licorice scented breeze. “Thank you,” I said feeling a familiar warmth emanating from this being. “You have questions, ask them, I am here, as I have always been, to answer them”. “OK” I stammered “I guess my first question is, What do you mean by, as you have always been?” Another warm breeze swirled around me, now filled with the scent of pine. 

   “I am the voice in your head that you have asked all those questions you have sought answers to for as long as you have been alive.”  

“Oooohhh I said as if that answer made sense, “Well then, here’s my second question, Am I dead, and is this heaven??” There was a pause before the voice now with a whimsical tone came back with…

“Well, that’s two questions, both are complicated. I will try to answer them so you can understand from your limited perspective. Turn back toward the valley, relax and observe what you have created.” As I did I felt again that familiar energy of oneness.  

The voice continued”You exist on many different vibrations of existence or realities all at the same moment. There is the 3 dimensional physical you that you are most aware of that has incarnated on a linear time frame. That one you consider being alive at this time. The part of you here experiencing this vision is doing so during what you think of as the sleep state. Both exist at the same moment but in different dimensional vibrations. There are many, many aspects of you spread out across existence also experiencing realities at this same moment”. 

This was getting a bit deep for me but sounded somehow familiar. “What do you mean by across existence?” I asked. Another pause before continuing .”While you are sitting here, all at the same moment, you are experiencing what a cloud is feeling or the smallest of bugs around you, aren’t you?.” 

 “Yes, it feels like I am part of everything,” I said ” but another thing Im confused about is I really wasn’t expecting bugs and worms in heaven. Dogs and cats even birds but there are bugs in heaven!?” And then as if it finally sunk in I added, “And what do you mean that I created?”. As another warm aromatic breeze washed over me it seemed to inspire a few of the birds to start a beautiful song. The silent pause to my questions seemed to be in respect for the melody being orchestrated. It was a chorus of birds and behind their rendition, I became aware of a tone that seemed to be in the background of everything. Ever since I was a child, I had a ringing in my ears and was told it was tinnitus. I always thought it was more than that. The sun’s vibration maybe? The moon? The earth itself? It was here too and gave me the impression that I had always been hearing the universe.

 The voice continued. “This is a transition place on your journey to the vibration you call heaven. It is a construct of all the things you have enjoyed while you have been incarnating on the earth plane. Look around and you will start to recognize the different parts of this Mozaic you have brought together.” I looked back toward the sun end of the valley. It was true. The big cumulus clouds were like the ones I loved to watch build into towering boiling mountains of white. At the bottom of one of these huge cumulus clouds, a brilliant rainbow now arched down toward the lake. I have always loved rainbows and the colors of this one were spectacular. This valley reminded me of a valley I once sat on the edge of in Switzerland. All the sunsets I made time to watch throughout the years, now a part of this one. I hadn’t been aware of time or of how long I had been sitting here but the sun hadn’t moved. Suddenly the underside of the clouds lit up with a brilliant combination of reds and oranges that seemed to suddenly appear as if I had forgotten to put them there in the first place. My gaze now turned upward toward the bright blue sky. As I looked higher the blue blended into blackness, filling with stars as big as quarters shining brightly. The Milkyway wandering across the sky with the big dipper and seven sisters of the Pallaides standing out. I have always been attracted to the Pallaides. It always felt like home. Turning back toward the moon, I could clearly see the craters and dark regions that created the man in the moon. The entity now standing to one side was no longer silhouetted, clearly a being of white light. “Ok, I’m feeling a connection but Bugs…” The entity answered before I could finish my thought “All the creatures you see around you are ones that you felt the compassion to save during your current third-dimensional incarnation. Those worms you would pull out of a puddle, the spiders you would catch and release back out into the wild. The animals like birds and mice that you would never let die alone, are all here to thank you for that compassion. As well as the birds, squirrels, dogs, and cats that you shared a living space with. They have all advanced in their evolution because of your kindness. Look down at the trail by the lake. Turning back. I could now see people, a small group, walking along the path toward my end of the lake. They seemed to be laughing and talking amongst themselves as they made their way along the path. “Who are they?” I thought, getting better at this way to communicate. “Don’t just look, feel.” “Use the oneness you’re experiencing.” I stopped thinking and felt the feeling of all. At first, it was a huge feeling of oneness that was hard to separate but as I let it flow through me I was able to separate out individual vibrations from the whole. I started to recognize personalities.

The first most obvious human vibration was that of my Dad, then Ken, Ted, Bungee, Deanna, Jan, even the chief. These were people that I had shared some degree of love. Then, as if remembering a truth from my past, whenever you create love, no matter how small or with who it is an energy that never dies. “GOOD!!!” the chorus thundered, the word echoed down the valley “You are remembering much faster than most!” 

“Now I recognize you,” I said mentally. “I have been talking to you since I was a little kid.” “You have always cheered me on” The voice still in a tone of praise 

“Yes, I have always been with you”. It is my honor to help you during this incarnation” For some reason, I got what that meant but I was too focused on the folks below to follow that up.

“So I’m going to get to see these folks again?”

 I was excited. I always knew I would one day.  

“No, not at this time,” the voice said calmly  

WHY NOT?? This time my voice echoed down the valley abruptly stopping the procession of souls on the trail.

  “It’s not time yet”. “You are still existing on the earth plane.” 

 “But I don’t want to go back there, I like it here, bugs and all.”  

“You aren’t finished with your contracts, you still have lots to do.” I was not liking what I was hearing. “Contracts!?!? “What contracts? I like it here. I feel way more a part of here than I have ever felt there.” 

 Softly From deep in my head “Before you incarnated you made agreements with many of your friends, other souls incarnating at the same time. You agreed to assist each other, should your paths happen to cross on your separate journeys. These contracts last for as long as both of you agree that assistance to each other is a benefit to both evolutions. Because of free will, you can extend these contracts but that doesn’t always work well because the ego tends to get involved. As you now remember once the love vibration is created it never dies and continues for lifetimes. Some of the love connections you have experienced in your present incarnation are continuations of previous love connections even though you don’t recognize a person physically.”

 A feeling of understanding surged through me.  

Now I looked down at the folks on the trail, they had all turned around and were walking away. “Where are they going? I said alarmed again saying it out loud, the question in an echo that trailed off to the far end of the valley. They were looking back up at me waving, I could feel the love that I had shared with them. The voice softly replied in a tone meant to calm me “When you do eventually make the transition you will find yourself in a place similar to this and all those friends, dogs, cats, and even birds and bugs will be here to greet you”. “Time doesn’t exist in this reality” “And you, I said.”will you be here as well?” “Of course, I am always with you, it is part of our contract with each other. Remember what you have learned here. You are one with everything and love is an energy that never dies.” Almost on cue Sam my rooster started crowing announcing that it was time to rise and shine shocking me back into my physical body. “NOOOOOO! I don’t want to come back yet.” But here I am. All the images and feelings of oneness still fresh. My eyes trying to focus in the morning light, my body feeling heavy in this 3-dimensional reality. Reluctantly I throw my legs over the side of the bed, throw on a T-shirt and wander over to my desk to turn on the computer. I can smell the coffee in the kitchen, the automatic coffee pot with its last gurgling noises as it finishes the brewing process. The cats begin to stretch before starting their morning gymnastics, bounding around the room and down the hall. With coffee in hand and before the memories fade I sit before the screen, hands positioned over the keyboard, I begin to type. 

    It was like waking from a dream…………….